one long pair of eyes

hmso 1
hmso 1 by Tim Caynes

would that I be bound for barrack street but there’s too much of me to go around and I have some lifting to do in the please allow me to introduce myself department. so instead I’m slatting down heigham rud with a scenic full of clart headed for citycare towers wherepon the st petersburg of the north west awaits with a tractor and a shovelful of whiff. on any given sunday its possible to identify 17 species of grass from your car window as you crawl into the chamber of 2 doors as half of costessey pass by grunting under the weight of manky carpets and old fridges that they did actually bring in the back of their sierra but they can’t be bothered to wait in the queue. I saw a 5 year old carrying a bin bag full of magazines up the road past ace waste the other week getting slapped up the ankles because she wasn’t carrying fast enough. I turned the radio up and saw a vole run under the wheels of a nissan terrano. then a huge balloon crashed into the wensum and the lights went out in langleys who coincidentally were giving away spelling tests for under 8s which was about right but we already had ‘accept’ and ‘except’ so just took a sylvanian family off the shelf and legged it up the castle where we lobbed them down the mound like they were paratrooping neil and christine hamilton.

steam doesn’t start again if you restart it. you have to start it again. there’s hundreds of way you can get it, but its not the one you get that kills you its the one after that so I’m still deciding which way my money’s going although I know that’s a very good cause but I’m not deciding while you’re stood on my doorstep if you’re not prepared to leave anything for me I can’t decide can I but I already give a lot away each month I’m choosing wisely I’ve got to go up to tip later it can happen to anyone 2 pound a month it is happening thankyou.

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