Things what I writ

I sometimes write nonsense about things to try and sound clever

open dog skating

thaas that loomoo 64
thaas that loomoo 64 by Tim Caynes

alright? ere. don’t let on to dave, but I just got this lot from a bloke in cheam an e reckons that there’s sumfin abaht nuffin going on dahn dagenham so I’s got to shift a bladdersworth before croaky gets back from the costa del sol an sees that blart from penge who’ll doubtless be on the case, right, so I’m gettin dahn the lockup later and we got a transit and a couple of befords gonna shift it down to stretford where graham can stick it in the warehouse until it all quietens down like. I mean, I ain’t got nuffin against that nonce bu e’s a liability ain’t e? I mean, you wos there right, when e ad that motor up from croydon an e was all makin out like it was like he’d won the bleedin lottery or suffin and dave was like ‘oi, you nonce, ave you won the bleedin lottery or suffin?’ and you know, well, that’s just like it is innit, so we ave to offload this load of rubbish or all hell breaks loose. its not like barry even took it up to luton like e was supposed to and so we’re all stuck waitin for the transport to shift it all nice an clean like, so nobody gets caught aht an noone gets clobbered, I mean you’d think it was common sense right to just lay one dahn ere so it just gets avoided but no, there’s alway some runt somewhere who’s gonna stick their foot right in it a spread it around all over the bleedin place an thas where the likes of you an me get the short end of it and ave to get the proverbial shovel aht and sort the bleedin mess aht. I mean, a bit of brains don’t cost nuffin, do they, so why’s e so short bleedin changed, eh? blimey, its freezin aht ere, ave you got one of them hats we were keepin? lovely.

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